Questions, and Answers
Q.—When iz the right time to marry?
A.—Enny whare between 21, and ninety-four years.
Q.—What iz a woman’s chief joy in this world?
A.—Her own or sumboddy else’s baby.
Q.—Which iz the most diffident, and humbel kritter amung the animals?
A.—A bobtailed kat, probberbly.
Q.—How menny yards ov 5 dollar silk duz it take to make a dress.
A.—I dont kno, but it allwuss takes 2 yards and a haff more than yu buy the fust time.
Q.—What do mankind gennerally take the most pride in?
A.—In sumthing their nabors haint got, nor kant git.
Q.—What two persons in the whole congregashun, need the clusset watching?
A.—A praying pollytisian, and an offishus deakon.
Q.—How iz the best way to git rid ov kokroaches?
A.—Sell out yure house, and lot, and jine the gipseys.
Q.—What cums the nearest to makeing a woman sware?
A.—To hav her clothes line brake when it iz full ov a Monday’s washing.
Q.—Which iz the two most thankless jobs in this world?
A.—To keep skool, and be an undertaker.
Q.—How do yu define experience?
A.—Experience iz the science ov finding out how deep a mill pond iz, by wading into it, and drowning.
Doublets
I kant help but respekt the heathen, they hav made az good a showing on their kapital, az the christians hav.
Next to the mother in law, cums the Grandmother, to regulate the cook, the kat, and the baby.
LIBRA, THE SKALES.
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