The Deakon
The deakon iz the fust lutenant in a meeting house. He iz a good christian man, but hiz kreed iz too often az mutch bother to him, az a yoke iz to a goose. He iz az full ov bizzness, and proviso’s az a wimmins rites convenshen. He often haz more pitty than branes, and generally, more fuss, than either. A good deakon, in a naborhood, iz a substanshall blessing, and bad deakons, thank Heaven, hav allwuss been skarse.
Sollum Things
The world iz bankrupt in morals, and if kind heaven wont settle with us, for 10 cents on the dollar, the devil will git the whole thing bi foreclosure.
Yu may make a servant ov a friend, but yu kant make a friend ov a servant, it aint natral.
The street boys git at him,
And ride him around,
’Till he staggers, and stumbles,
And falls to the ground.