Settling the Wine Bill — 445
An officer staying at a hotel in Washington, on asking for his bill one morning, found that a quart of wine was charged when he had but a pint. He took exceptions to the item. Landlord was incorrigible: said there never was any mistake about the wine bills. Officer paid it, and went to his room to pack his carpet-bag. Having made purchases, his bag was too full to let in an extra pair of boots. Landlord was sent for—came. Says the officer, “I can’t get these boots into this d——d bag.”—Landlord: “If you can’t, I am sure I can’t.”—Officer: “Yes you can; for a man who can put a quart of wine into a pint bottle can put these boots into that bag.” Landlord laughed heartily, cancelled the whole bill, and returned the amount.
What a sight there is in that word—smile; for it changes colour like a chameleon. There’s a vacant smile, a cold smile, a smile of approbation, a friendly smile; but, above all, a smile of love. A woman has two smiles that an angel might envy—the smile that accepts the lover before words are uttered, and the smile that lights on the first-born baby, and assures him of a mother’s love.—Sam Slick.