§ 342 Returning in the Regular Manner
This one was a favorite with the late Joseph H. Choate. I heard him use it more than once when he was making after-dinner speeches.
“I had a friend once, named Smith,” said Mr. Choate, “whose son, although of comparatively tender years, was addicted to the reprehensible habit of indulging in alcoholic beverages. The father packed him off to Harvard in the hope that the youth might become interested in educational matters and lose his craving for hard liquor.
“It appeared that the father’s hopes were to be gratified, because the young man, in writing home to ask that his allowance be increased, told his sire that he had mended his ways and now was devoting himself exclusively to the undertaking of acquiring learning. The senior was most highly gratified. He decided to run up to Cambridge and personally congratulate his offspring upon the reformation which had been effected. To make the meeting more pleasant he would take the youngster by surprise. So, without announcing his intention, he started.
“But the train was delayed and Mr. Smith did not reach Cambridge until after midnight. He got in a cab and rode to the boy’s boarding-house. The building was dark.
“He felt his way up the walk, rang the doorbell and pounded on the door. Eventually an upstairs window was opened and an elderly lady, the proprietor of the establishment, showed her head.
“‘Well,’ she called out, ‘what is wanted?’
“‘Does Henry Smith, Jr., live here?’ asked the father.
“‘Yes,’ said the old lady, wearily. ‘Carry him in.’”