First Aid
A Goop writes: “What is good for sclaffing?”
(Reply: Any smooth piece of turf. Do not attempt to sclaff in tall grass, as the club might break on a concealed stone.)
Sherlock writes: “I look at the ball, but I top it just the same. What do you make of that, Watson?”
(Reply: Very likely you look at the ball with your left eye, instead of your right. The right eye, being farther from the ball, can see farther under it. The cleanest hitter we know has a left eye of glass.)
Moron writes: “I am a chronic slicer; so desperate is my disease, I have to allow for the slice on every shot, even in practice swings. Can anything be done?”
(Reply: Cut out meats, eat plenty of green vegetables, and take long walks in the open air—which is really the most convenient place for long walks. Report to us again in three years.)
Fluff writes: “With a strong wind blowing from east to west, should I slice or pull?”
(Reply: You neglect to say whether you are going north or south. If you are going south, pray give our regards to the bunch at Belleair.)
A valued reader, Mr. D. Precox, writes us that, after testing a suggestion we advanced in March, he perfectly agrees that topping is invited by regarding the ball with the left eye, but discouraged by regarding it with the right. “Unfortunately,” he communicates, “my left eye is not of glass, like your cleanest hitter’s, nor can I break it of the habit of looking at the ball. In these critical circumstances what would you advise?” We can only refer Mr. Precox to the best of authorities. If his left eye offends him, let him pluck it out. No sacrifice is too great. What is an eye more or less when a perfect pitch to the pin is demanded?