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Shakespeare Jest-Books: A Hundred Mery Talys

by W. Carew Hazlitt

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  1. 1Vol. I — Shakespeare Jest-Books…
  2. 2¶ A C. Mery Talys
  3. 3Introduction
  4. 4A C. — Mery Talys
  5. 5¶ of John Adroyns in the Dyuyls Apparell. Iii
  6. 6¶ of the Ryche Man and His Two Sonnes. Iv
  7. 7¶ of the Cockolde Who Gained a Ring by His Iudgment. V
  8. 8¶ of the Scoler That Gave His Shoes to Cloute. Vi
  9. 9¶ of Hym That Said That a Womans Tongue Was Lightest of Digestion. Vii
  10. 10¶ of the Woman That Followed Her Fourth Husbands Bere and Wept. Viii
  11. 11¶ of the Woman That Sayd Her Woer Came Too Late. Ix
  12. 12¶ of the Mylner With the Golden Thombe. X
  13. 13¶ of the Horseman of Irelande That Prayde Oconer for to Hange Up th…
  14. 14¶ of the Preest That Sayd Nother Corpus Meus nor Corpus Meum. Xii
  15. 15¶ of Two Freres Whereof the One Loued Nat the Ele Heed nor the Othe…
  16. 16¶ of the Welche Man That Shroue Hym for Brekynge of Hys Faste on th…
  17. 17¶ of the Merchaunte of London That Dyd Put Nobles in His Mouthe in…
  18. 18¶ of the Mylner That Stale the Nuttes of the Tayler That Stale a Sh…
  19. 19¶ of the Foure Elementes Where They Shoulde Sone Be Founde. Xvii
  20. 20¶ of the Woman That Poured the Potage in the Iudges Male. Xviii
  21. 21¶ of the Wedded Men That Came to Heuen to Clayme Theyr Herytage. Xix
  22. 22¶ of the Merchaunte That Charged His Sonne to Fynde One to Synge fo…
  23. 23¶ of the Mayde Wasshynge Clothes That Answered the Frere. Xxi
  24. 24¶ of the Thre Wyse Men of Gotam. Xxii
  25. 25¶ of the Graye Frere That Answered His Penytente. Xxiii
  26. 26¶ of the Gentylman That Bare the Sege Borde on Hys Necke. Xxiv
  27. 27¶ of the Merchantes Wyfe That Sayd She Wolde Take a Nap at Sermon. XXV
  28. 28¶ of the Gentylman That Wysshed His Tothe in the Gentylwomans Tayle…
  29. 29¶ of the Welcheman That Confessyd Hym Howe He Had Slayne a Frere. X…
  30. 30¶ of the Welcheman That Coude Nat Gette but a Lytell Male. XXIX
  31. 31¶ of the Gentyll Woman That Sayde to a Gentyll Man: Ye Haue a Berde…
  32. 32¶ of the Frere That Sayde Our Lorde Fed Fyue M. People With Iii. Fy…
  33. 33¶ of the Frankelyn That Wold Haue Had the Frere Gone. XXXII
  34. 34¶ of the Prest That Sayd Our Lady Was Not So Curyous a Woman. XXXIII
  35. 35¶ of the Good Man That Sayde to His Wyfe He Had Euyll Fare. XXXIV
  36. 36¶ of the Gentylman That Asked the Frere for His Beuer. XXXVI
  37. 37¶ of the Thre Men That Chose the Woman. XXXVII
  38. 38¶ of the Gentylman That Taught His Cooke the Medycyne for the Totha…
  39. 39¶ of the Gentylman That Promysed the Scoler of Oxforde a Sarcanet T…
  40. 40¶ of Mayster Skelton That Brought the Bysshop of Norwiche Ii Fesaun…
  41. 41¶ of the Yeman of Garde That Sayd He Wolde Bete the Carter. XLI
  42. 42¶ of the Fole That Saide He Had Leuer Go to Hell Than to Heuen. XLII
  43. 43¶ of the Plowmannys Sonne That Sayde He Sawe One Make a Gose to Cre…
  44. 44¶ of the Maydes Answere That Was With Chylde. XLIV
  45. 45¶ of the Seruaunt That Rymyd With Hys Mayster. XLV
  46. 46¶ of the Welcheman That Delyuered the Letter to the Ape. XLVI
  47. 47¶ of Hym That Solde Ryght Nought. XLVII
  48. 48¶ of the Frere That Tolde the Thre Chyldres Fortunes. XLVIII
  49. 49¶ of the Boy That Bare the Frere His Masters Money. XLIX
  50. 50¶ of Phylyp Spencer the Bochers Man. l
  51. 51¶ of the Courtear and the Carter. Li
  52. 52¶ of the Yongman That Prayd His Felow to Teche Hym Hys Paternoster.…
  53. 53¶ of the Frere That Prechyd in Ryme Expownynge the Ave Maria. LIII
  54. 54¶ of the Curat That Prechyd the Artycles of the Crede. Liv
  55. 55¶ of the Frere That Prechyd the x Commaundementis. Lv
  56. 56¶ of the Wyfe That Bad Her Husbande Ete the Candell Fyrste. LVI
  57. 57¶ of the Man of Lawes Sonnes Answer. LVII
  58. 58¶ of the Frere in the Pulpet That Bad the Woman Leue Her Babelynge.…
  59. 59¶ of the Welchman That Cast the Scotte Into the See. LIX
  60. 60¶ of the Man That Had the Dome Wyfe. Lx
  61. 61¶ of the Proctour of Arches That Had the Lytel Wyfe. LXI
  62. 62¶ of Ii Nonnes That Were Shryuen of One Preste. LXII
  63. 63¶ of the Esquyer That Sholde Have Ben Made Knyght. LXIII
  64. 64¶ of Him That Wolde Gette the Maystrye of His Wyfe. LXIV
  65. 65¶ of the Penytent That Sayd the Shepe of God Have Mercy Upon Me. LXV
  66. 66¶ of the Husbande That Sayd He Was John Daw. LXVI
  67. 67¶ of the Scoler of Oxforde That Proued by Souestry Ii Chykens Iii.…
  68. 68¶ of the Frere That Stale the Podynge. LXVIII
  69. 69¶ of the Frankelyns Sonne That Cam to Take Ordres. LXIX
  70. 70¶ of the Husbandman That Lodgyd the Frere in His Own Bedde. LXX
  71. 71¶ of the Preste That Wolde Say Two Gospels for a Grote. LXXI
  72. 72¶ of the Frere That Prechyd What Mennys Sowles Were. LXXIII
  73. 73¶ of the Husbande That Cryed Ble Under the Bed. LXXIV
  74. 74¶ of the Shomaker That Asked the Colyer What Tydynges in Hell. LXXV
  75. 75¶ of Seynt Peter That Cryed Cause Bobe. LXXVI
  76. 76¶ of Hym That Aduenturyd Body and Soule for Hys Prynce. LXXVII
  77. 77¶ of the Welchman That Saw One Xls. Better Than God. LXXIX
  78. 78¶ of the Frere That Said Dyryge for the Hoggys Soule. LXXX
  79. 79¶ of the Parson That Sayde Masse of Requiem for Crystes Soul. LXXXI
  80. 80¶ of the Herdeman That Sayde: Ryde Apace, Ye Shall Haue Rayn. LXXXII
  81. 81¶ of Hym That Sayde: I Shall Haue Nener a Peny. LXXXIII
  82. 82¶ of the Prest That Sayde Comede Episcope. LXXXV
  83. 83¶ of the Woman That Stale the Pot. LXXXVI
  84. 84¶ of Mayster Whyttynton Dreme. LXXXVII
  85. 85¶ of the Prest That Killed His Horse Called Modicus. LXXXVIII
  86. 86¶ of the Welcheman That Stale the Englysshmans Cocke. LXXXIX
  87. 87¶ of Hym That Brought a Botell to a Preste. Xc
  88. 88¶ of the Endytement of Jesu of Nazareth. XCI
  89. 89¶ of the Frere That Preched Agaynst Them That Rode on the Sonday. XCII
  90. 90¶ of the One Broder That Founde a Purs. XCIII
  91. 91¶ of the Answere of the Mastres to the Mayde. XCIV
  92. 92¶ of the Burnynge of Olde John. XCVI
  93. 93¶ of the Courtear That Ete the Hot Custarde. XCVII
  94. 94¶ of the Thre Pointes Belonging to a Shrewd Wyfe. XCIX
  95. 95¶ of the Man That Paynted the Lamb Upon His Wyfes Bely. C
  96. 96Additional Notes and Illustrations — A C. Mery Talys
  97. 97The Table
  98. 98Tales and Quicke Answeres
  99. 99¶ of Hym That Preched on Saynt Chrystophers Day. II
  100. 100¶ of the Frenche Man, That Stroue With the Janway for His Armes. Iii
  101. 101¶ of the Curate That Sayde Our Lorde Fedde U. C. Persons. Iiii
  102. 102¶ of Hym That Profered His Doughter in Mariage. V
  103. 103¶ of Them That Came to London to Bye a Crucifixe. Vi
  104. 104¶ of Hym That Folowed His Wyfe to Buryenge. Vii
  105. 105¶ of Hym That Felle Into the Fyre. Viii
  106. 106¶ of Him That Vsed to Cal His Servant the Kinge of Foles. Ix
  107. 107¶ of the Yonge Woman That Sorowed So Greatly Her Husbondes Deth. X
  108. 108¶ of Him That Kissed the Mayd With the Longe Nose. Xi
  109. 109¶ the Uplandisshe Mans Answere, Concerninge the Steple and Pulpit. Xii
  110. 110¶ of the Beggers Answere to M. Skelton the Poete. Xiii
  111. 111¶ of the Chaplen, That Sayde Our Lady Matens a Bed. Xiiii
  112. 112¶ of Him That Lost His Purse in London. Xv
  113. 113¶ of the Marchaunt That Lost His Bodgette Betwene Ware and Lon[don]…
  114. 114¶ of Him That Was Called Cuckolde. Xvii
  115. 115¶ of the Iolous Man. Xviii
  116. 116¶ of the Fatte Woman That Solde Frute. Xix
  117. 117¶ of a Poller That Begyled a Prest. Xx
  118. 118¶ of Papirius Pretextatus. Xxi
  119. 119¶ of the Corrupte Man of Lawe. Xxii
  120. 120¶ of Kynge Lowes of France, and the Husbandman. Xxiii
  121. 121¶ of an Other Picke-Thanke, and the Same Kinge. Xxiiii
  122. 122¶ of Thales the Astronomer That Fell in a Ditch. XXV
  123. 123¶ of the Astronomer That Theues Robbed. XXVI
  124. 124¶ of the Plough Man That Sayde His Pater Noster. XXVII
  125. 125¶ of Him That Dreamed He Fonde Golde. XXVIII
  126. 126¶ of the Crakynge Yonge Gentyll Man, That Wold Ouerthrowe His Enmye…
  127. 127¶ of Hym That Fell of a Tre and Brake His Rybbe. Xxx
  128. 128¶ of the Frier That Brayde in His Sermon. XXXI
  129. 129¶ the Oration of the Ambassadour Sent to Pope Urban. XXXII
  130. 130¶ of the Ambassadour Sent to the Prince Agis. XXXIII
  131. 131¶ the Answere of Cleomenes to the Samiens Ambassadour. Xxxiiii
  132. 132¶ of the Wyse Man Piso and His Seruant. XXXV
  133. 133¶ of the Marchant That Made a Wager With His Lord. XXXVI
  134. 134¶ of the Friere That Gaue Scrowes Agaynst the Pestilence. XXXVII
  135. 135¶ of the Phisitian, That Vsed to Write Bylles Ouer Eue. XXXVIII
  136. 136¶ of Hym That Wolde Confesse Hym by Writinge. XXXIX
  137. 137¶ of the Hermite of Padowe. Xl
  138. 138¶ of the Uplandysshe Man, That Sawe the Kynge. XLI
  139. 139¶ of the Courtier That Bad the Boy Holde His Horse. XLII
  140. 140¶ of the Deceytfull Scriuener. XLIII
  141. 141¶ of Hym That Saide He Beleued His Wyfe Better Than Other, That She…
  142. 142¶ of Hym That Payde His Dette With Crienge Bea. XLV
  143. 143¶ of the Woman That Appeled Fro Kyng Philip to Kynge Philippe. XLVI
  144. 144¶ of the Olde Woman, That Prayde for the Welfare of the Tyrant Deni…
  145. 145¶ of the Phisitian Eumonus. XLVIII
  146. 146¶ of Socrates and His Scoldinge Wyfe. XLIX
  147. 147¶ of the Phisitian That Bare His Paciente on Honde, He Had Eaten an…
  148. 148¶ of the Inholders Wyfe and Her Ii Louers. Li
  149. 149¶ of Hym That Healed Franticke Men. LII
  150. 150¶ of Hym That Sayde He Was Not Worthy to Open the Gate to the Kynge…
  151. 151¶ of Mayster Uauasour and Turpin His Man. Liiii
  152. 152¶ of Hym That Sought His Wyfe Agaynst the Streme. Lv
  153. 153¶ of Hym That at a Skyrmyshe Defended Him With His Feet. LVI
  154. 154¶ of Hym That Wolde Gyue a Songe for His Dyner. LVII
  155. 155¶ of the Foole That Thought Hym Selfe Deed. LVIII
  156. 156¶ of the Olde Man and His Sonne That Brought His Asse to the Towne…
  157. 157¶ of Him That Sought His Asse and Rode on His Backe. Lx
  158. 158¶ the Answere of Fabius to Liuius. LXI
  159. 159¶ the Answere of Poltis, the Kynge of Thrace, to the Troyan Embassa…
  160. 160¶ the Wyse Answere of Hanibal to Kynge Antiochus, Concerninge His R…
  161. 161¶ the Wordes of Popilius the Romayn Embassadour to Antiochus the Ky…
  162. 162¶ of Him That Loued the Marchants Wyfe. LXV
  163. 163¶ of the Woman That Couerd Her Heed and Shewed Her Taile. LXVI
  164. 164¶ Howe Alexander Was Monysshed to Slee the Fyrste That He Mette. LXVII
  165. 165¶ Howe the Cite of Lamsac Was Saued From Destruction. LXVIII
  166. 166¶ Howe Demosthenes Defended a Mayde. LXIX
  167. 167¶ of Him That Desired to Be Made a Gentilman. LXX
  168. 168¶ of the Gentyll Man and His Shrewde Wyfe. LXXI
  169. 169¶ of the Two Yonge Men That Rode to Walsyngham. LXXII
  170. 170¶ of the Yonge Man of Bruges, and His Spouse. LXXIII
  171. 171¶ of Hym That Made as He Hadde Ben a Chaste Lyuer. Lxxiiii
  172. 172¶ of Hym That the Olde Roode Fell on. LXXV
  173. 173¶ of the Wydow That Wolde Nat Wedde for Bodily Pleasure. LXXVI
  174. 174¶ of the Couetous Ambassodour, That Wolde Here No Musike. LXXVII
  175. 175¶ How Denise the Tirant Serued a Couetous Man. LXXIX
  176. 176¶ of the Olde Man, That Quengered the Boy Oute of the Apletree With…
  177. 177¶ of the Ryche Man That Wolde Not Haue a Glyster. LXXXI
  178. 178¶ of Hym That Feyned Hym Selfe Deed to Proue What His Wyfe Wolde Do…
  179. 179¶ of the Poure Man, Into Whose House Theues Brake by Nyghte. LXXXIII
  180. 180¶ of Hym That Shulde Haue Ben Hanged for His Scoffynge. Lxxxiiii
  181. 181¶ of Hym That Had His Goose Stole. LXXXV
  182. 182¶ of the Begger That Sayd He Was Kyn to Kyng Philip of Macedone. LX…
  183. 183¶ of Dantes Answere to the Iester. LXXXVII
  184. 184¶ of Hym That Had Sore Eyes. LXXXVIII
  185. 185¶ of the Olde Woman That Had Sore Eyes. LXXXIX
  186. 186¶ of Hym That Had the Custodi of a Warde. Xc
  187. 187¶ of the Excellent Paynter, That Had Foule Children. XCI
  188. 188¶ of the Scoffer That Made a Man a South Sayer. XCII
  189. 189¶ of the Marchaunt of Florence Called Charles. XCIII
  190. 190¶ of the Chesshire Man Called Eulyn. Xciiii
  191. 191¶ of Him That Desired to Be Set Vpon the Pillori. XCV
  192. 192¶ of the Wydowes Daughter That Was Sent to the Abbot With a Couple…
  193. 193¶ of the Two Men, That Dranke a Pynte of Whyte Wyne to Gether. XCVII
  194. 194¶ of the Doctour That Went With the Fouler to Catche Byrdes. XCVIII
  195. 195¶ of Hym That Vndertoke to Teache an Asse to Rede. XCIX
  196. 196¶ of the Fryer That Confessed the Woman. C
  197. 197¶ Howe a Chaplen of Louen Deceyued an Vsurer. Ci
  198. 198¶ of the Same Chaplen and One That Spited Him. CII
  199. 199¶ of the Olde Man That Put Him Selfe in His Sonnes Handes. CIII
  200. 200¶ of Hym That Had a Flye Peynted in His Shilde. Ciiii
  201. 201¶ of Th’ Emperour Augustus and the Olde Men. Cv
  202. 202¶ Phocions Oration to the Athen[ian]s. CVI
  203. 203¶ of Demosthenes and Phocion. CVII
  204. 204¶ of Phocion That Refused Alexanders Gyfte. CVIII
  205. 205¶ of Denyse the Tyranne and His Sonne. CIX
  206. 206¶ of Pomponius the Romayne, That Was Brought Before Mithridates. Cx
  207. 207¶ of Titus and the Iester. CXI
  208. 208¶ of Scipio Nasica and Ennius the Poete. CXII
  209. 209¶ of Fabius Minutius and His Sonne. CXIII
  210. 210¶ of Aurelian, That Was Displeased, Bycause the Cite Tyna Was Close…
  211. 211¶ of the Nunne Forced That Durst Not Crie. CXV
  212. 212¶ of Him That Sayde He Was the Diuelles Man. CXVI
  213. 213¶ of the Vplandishe Priest, That Preached of Charitie. CXVII
  214. 214¶ Another Sayinge of the Same Preest. CXVIII
  215. 215¶ of the Fryer That Praysed Sainct Frauncis. CXIX
  216. 216¶ of Hym That Warned His Wife of Wasshynge Her Face in Foule Puddel…
  217. 217¶ of the Husbandman That Caused the Iudge to Geue Sentence Agaynst…
  218. 218¶ of the Italian Friar That Shoulde Preach Before the B. of Rome an…
  219. 219¶ of the Doctour That Sayd, in Erasmus Workes Were Heresies. CXXIII
  220. 220¶ of the Frier That Preached at Paules Crosse Agaynst Erasmus. CXXIV
  221. 221¶ of an Other Frier That Taxed Erasmus for Writyng Germana Theologi…
  222. 222¶ of an Other That Inueighed Agaynst the Same Erasmus. CXXVI
  223. 223¶ of Kyng Richarde the Iii, and the Northern Man. CXXVII
  224. 224¶ of the Canon and His Man. CXXVIII
  225. 225¶ of the Same Canon and His Sayd Man. CXXIX
  226. 226¶ of the Gentilman That Checked Hys Seruant for Talke of Ryngyng. CXXX
  227. 227¶ of the Blynde Man and His Boye. CXXXI
  228. 228¶ of Him That Sold Two Lodes of Hey. CXXXII
  229. 229¶ How a Mery Man Deuised to Cal People to a Playe. CXXXIII
  230. 230¶ How the Image of the Dyuell Was Lost and Sought. Cxxxiiii
  231. 231¶ of Tachas, Kyng of Aegypt, and Agesilaus. CXXXV
  232. 232¶ of Corar the Rhetorician, and Tisias Hys Scoler. CXXXVI
  233. 233¶ of Augustus and Athenodorus the Phylosopher. CXXXVII
  234. 234¶ of the Frenche Kyng and the Brome Seller. CXXXVIII
  235. 235¶ an Other Tale of the Same Frenche Kyng. CXXXIX
  236. 236¶ What an Italyan Fryer Dyd in His Preachyng. CXL

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