Scene VII
Enter Pythias; Parmeno at a distance.
Pyth. Well! I was ne’er more pleas’d in all my life
Than when I saw th’ old man come blund’ring in.
I had the jest alone; for I alone
Knew what he was afraid of.
Par. Hey! what now?
Pyth. I’m now come forth t’ encounter Parmeno.
Where is he?
Par. She seeks me.
Pyth. Oh, there he is.
I’ll go up to him.
Par. Well, fool, what’s the matter? (Pythias laughs.)
What would you? what d’ye laugh at? Hey! what still?
Pyth. Oh, I shall die: I’m horribly fatigu’d
With laughing at you. (Laughing heartily.)
Par. For what cause?
Pyth. What cause?
Par. Why so? pray!
Pyth. Why so? (Laughing.)
I ne’er saw, ne’er shall see, a greater fool.
Oh, it’s impossible to tell what sport
You’ve made within.—I swear, I always thought
That you had been a shrewd, sharp, cunning fellow.
What! to believe directly what I told you!
Or was not you contented with the crime
You urg’d the youth to perpetrate, unless
You afterwards betray’d him to his father?
Or was you prick’d in conscience for the sin
The young man had committed through your means,
That you must after tell his father of him?
How d’ye suppose he felt when old gray-beard
Surpris’d him in that habit?—What! you find
That you’re undone. (Laughing heartily.)
Par. What’s this, impertinence?
Was it a lie you told me? D’ye laugh still?
Is’t such a jest to make fools of us, hag?
Pyth. Delightful! (Laughing.)
Par. If you don’t pay dearly for it!——
Pyth. Perhaps so. (Laughing.)
Par. I’ll return it.
Pyth. Oh, no doubt on’t. (Laughing.)
But what you threaten, Parmeno, is distant:
You’ll be truss’d up to-day; who first draw in
A raw young man to sin, and then betray him.
They’ll both conspire to make you an example. (Laughing.)
Par. I’m done for.
Pyth. Take this, slave, as a reward
For the fine gift you sent us; so, farewell!
Exit Pythias.
Par. I’ve been a fool indeed; and like a rat,
Betray’d myself to-day by my own squeaking.