Ass-Ass-Ination22
“Write me down an Ass.”—Shakspeare.
The Earl of Grosvenor is an Ass-
—erter of our freedom;
And were he Canterbury’s Grace,
The Gospels in his Sovereign’s face,
He’d rather throw, than read ’em.
My Lord of Grantham is an Ass-
—ailer of Black Wooler.
But, if this blustering York Hussar
Were tried in any real war,
’Tis thought he might be cooler.
Lord Enniskillen is an Ass-
—enter to Lord Grantham;
Bold, generous, noisy, swearing friends—
Till they have gain’d their private ends,
And that their patrons want ’em.
The Earl of Harewood is an Ass-
—ured help in trouble;
For, when his Lordship condescends,
Out of a scrape to help his friends,
He only makes it double.
The Earl of Morley is an Ass-
—istant to Lord Granville;
His head outside is rich in shoot;
But to beat anything into ’t
I’d rather thump an anvil.
Crazy Lord Erskine is an Ass-
—ortment of all follies:
He was the first to slur the Queen;
But since his trip to Gretna Green,
He’s wondrous kind to dollies.
The good Lord Kenyon is an Ass-
—uager of dissension;
With feeble voice, and maudlin eye,
He would have pray’d for infamy,
And granted sin a pension.
The Lord Ashburton is an Ass-
—iduous attender;
No voter for the Queen is stouter,
Although he knows no more about her,
Than of the Witch of Endor.
The Duke of Leinster is an Ass-
—ociate whom she flatters;
Though, by two uncles he has seen,
To hate a King, and love a Queen,
Are rather ticklish matters.
In short, each Whig Lord is an Ass-
—emblage of all merit;
And to reward their virtuous lives,
May all their daughters and their wives
The Queen’s good taste inherit.
Lord Blessington’s a stage-struck Ass-
—umer of Lothario;
But by his talents, wit, or grace,
(Had he but eyes to find his place,)
He’s fitter for Paddy Cary O!
Lord Steward Cholmondeley is an Ass-
—imilate Polonius!
He dares not blame “the mob-led Queen,”
Though he best knows, her loves have been
What others call erroneous.
Lord Arden’s an official Ass-
—ignee of naval prizes;
And, as the moon affects the seas,
His loyalty obeys his fees,
And with them falls or rises.
Lord Hampden is a twaddling Ass-
—assin of our patience;
This Guelphic Knight, so dire and thin,
Rides his white horse in the train of sin,
Like Death in the Revelations!