LX Josh Chaws His Cud
Earthli glory is sum like potatoze on very ritch sile,—top plenty,—tater skase.
It aint so much trouble tew git ritch, as it is tew tell when we hav got ritch.
The most bitter sarkasm sleeps in silent words.
It is unkommon hard tew annihilate a man with words,—altho it is often undertook.
Hope is evryboddy’s handmaid—she is a sli coquet and promises menny favors, but grants only a fu, and them are badly diskounted.
If yu want tew git at the circumference ov a man, examine him among men,—but if yu want tew get at his aktual diameter, meazure him at his fireside.
Thare is nothing so difficult tew hide as our follys.
Thare seems tew be 4 styles ov mind,—
1st, them who know it iz so!
2d, them who know it aint so!
3d, them who split the diffrence, and guess at it!
4th, them who don’t care a darn which way it is!
Thare is but few men who hav karackter enuff tew lead a life ov idleness.
True Love is spelt just the same in Choctaw, as it is in English.
Thoze who retire from the world on akount ov its sin and peskyness, must not forgit that they hav got tew keep kompany with a person who wants just as much watching as ennyboddy else.
Buty that don’t make a woman vain makes her very butiful.
A puppy plays with evry pup he meets, but old dorgs hav but fu associates.
He who buys what he kant want, will ear long want what he kant buy.
It kosts a good deal tew be wise, but it don’t kost ennything tew be happy.
Necessity begot Invenshun, Invenshun begot Convenience, Convenience begot Pleasure, Pleasure begot Luxury, Luxury begot Riot and Disease, Riot and Disease, between them, begot Poverty, and Poverty begot Necessity again,—this is the revolushun ov man, and is about aul he kan brag on.
Power either makes a man a tyrant, or a tool.
Thare is no such thing as flattery,—if commendashun is deserved, it is no flattery, but truth, and if commendashun is undeserved, it is not flattery, but slander.
“Man was kreated a little lower than the Angels,”—and it is lucky for the said Angels that he was.
“The luxury ov grief!”—this, i take it, means tew hav yure old unkle die, and leave yu $9000, and yu cry.
“Love lies bleeding!”—this is probably one ov the bludiest lies that ever was told.