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‹Better GutenbergThe Comic Poems of Thomas HoodTo Mary Housemaid. On Valentine’s Day · 88 of 204Contents›

The Comic Poems of Thomas Hood

by Thomas Hood

88 of 204 · Contents · Download EPUB

To Mary Housemaid. On Valentine’s Day

MARY, you know I’ve no love-nonsense,
And, though I pen on such a day,
I don’t mean flirting, on my conscience,
  Or writing in the courting way.

Though Beauty hasn’t form’d your feature,
  It saves you, p’rhaps, from being vain,
And many a poor unhappy creature
  May wish that she was half as plain.

Your virtues would not rise an inch,
  Although your shape was two foot taller,
And wisely you let others pinch
  Great waists and feet to make them smaller.

You never try to spare your hands
  From getting red by household duty,
But, doing all that it commands,
  Their coarseness is a moral beauty.

Let Susan flourish her fair arms
  And at your old legs sneer and scoff,
But let her laugh, for you have charms
  That nobody knows nothing of.

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