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The Comic Poems of Thomas Hood

by Thomas Hood

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“Up the Rhine.”

WHY, Tourist, why
With Passports have to do?
Pr’ythee stay at home and pass
  The Port and Sherry too.

Why, Tourist, why
  Embark for Rotterdam?
Pr’ythee stay at home and take
  Thy Hollands in a dram.

Why, Tourist, why
  To foreign climes repair?
Pr’ythee take thy German Flute,
  And breathe a German air.

Why, Tourist, why
  The Seven Mountains view?
Any one at home can tint
  A hill with Prussian Blue.

Why, Tourist, why
  To old Colonia’s walls?
Sure, to see a Wrenish Dome,
  One needn’t leave St. Paul’s.

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