The Roosevelt Bears Entertain — Philadelphia Children
The theatre chairs were filled with fun,
For a boy or girl was in every one
Except the four which Jack and Will
And the Roosevelt Bears had come to fill.
The band was playing the latest air
And laughing children everywhere
As the Bears walked down the central aisle
In their summer suits cut Philadelphia style.
They looked so jolly and smiled so sweet
That the children clapped and stamped their feet
And waved their hands and stood on chairs
And cried “Hurrah for the Roosevelt Bears!”
But the Bears were large and the seats were small
And they found they couldn’t sit down at all;
So they stood in the aisle to view the crowd,
And thus spoke TEDDY-B out loud:
“Young ladies and gentlemen; children dear;
And chairman too, if there is one here,
TEDDY-G and I have come to stay,
To hear you laugh and to see the play,
And since we can’t very well sit down
We’ll go on the stage and help the clown,
And stand and sit on wall or floor
And do some tricks we have done before,
And some quite old and some quite new,
And keep it up till the show is through.”
The children called for TEDDY-G,
But he shook his head and said that he
Could sing a song or dance a jig,
Or sit on chairs either small or big,
Or talk to girls or with them dine,
But to make a speech wasn’t quite his line.
The speeches through, a theatre page
Took the two Bears back upon the stage.
As the curtain rolled up to the top
A man at the back asked the Bears to stop:
“Two clowns are on the stage,” said he,
“They have started their piece and I’ll let you see
That you can’t interrupt or make a noise
Or you’ll spoil this show for these girls and boys.”
“Your advice is right,” said TEDDY-B,
And out they went the clowns to see.
The clowns were scared when they saw the Bears
Step up behind them unawares,
And they ran for doors at left and right
And as quick as wink were out of sight.
But they were ordered back to earn their fee
And to take a turn with TEDDIES-B and G.
And from that hour the play went smart
For the two bears helped in every part.
They made those two clowns march and sing,
Jump over chairs and through a ring,
And climb up poles and ride a wheel
And do a clog-dance, toe and heel.
And when they finished amid loud applause
The Bears ran off on all four paws
With the clowns on backs with jolly noise
Throwing kisses back to girls and boys.
The orchestra played “A Boy called Taps”
And then appeared a troupe of Japs:
A dozen little men in tights,
The heroes of a hundred fights.
For a little while the Bears stood by
And watched the Japs their muscles try,
And saw them balance balls and bricks
On parasols and billiard sticks,
And climb up ladders out of sight
And fall again and land all right.
Then TEDDY-B said he’d like to do
A Western schoolboy trick he knew.
He made the Japs stand in a row
And take hold of hands and not let go.
Then he caught one end and with whirling clip
He showed them how to crack the whip.
The Japs went whizzing in the air
And whirled in circles everywhere;
But they did the trick so smart and neat
That every Jap lit on his feet.
A man with hoops was next to play
And he asked if TEDDY-G would stay
And help him show the boys and girls
How wooden hoops were taught their twirls.
But this trick with hoops put TEDDY-G
In so many circles he couldn’t see.
They came flying at him through the air
And rolling in from everywhere;
And try his best he couldn’t throw
A single hoop and make it go.
He was hooped around from head to paw,
The funniest sight you ever saw;
But he enjoyed the fun and said that he
Wore rings enough that day for three.
But the jolliest thing that day was when
The two Bears dressed as Irishmen:
A Dublin Mike and a Pat from Cork
Came on the stage to look for work;
TEDDY-G as Mike with workman’s hod
And TEDDY-B as Pat from Blarney sod;
With blackthorn sticks their foes to hit,
And filled to the brim with Irish wit.
Their Irish brogue in joke and song
Made the children laugh both loud and long.
The last part of the show that day
Was sleight of hand, the programs say,
But why it failed to work out well
The man who tried it couldn’t tell.
A trunk was brought, a solid mass,
With iron locks and bound in brass.
The Bears were asked to get inside;
The trunk was locked and with rope was tied
And the man announced that at his command
He’d slide a curtain and there would stand
The Roosevelt Bears outside and free
With the trunk unlocked by any key.
But it didn’t work; the Bears weren’t there,
And it gave the man a little scare
To find he couldn’t do the trick,
And the trunk was unlocked pretty quick
For fear they’d smother for want of air,
But the Bears had gone no one knows where.
The trunk was empty; not as they feared;
The Roosevelt Bears had disappeared.
The Bears had gone, but no one knew
Just where to look or what to do.
Detectives hunted high and low
And questioned folks who ought to know,
And listened for the slightest sound
And hunted rooms beneath the ground,
And through the halls walked round and round,
But not a trace of the Bears they found.
At supper-time at home that night
The boys and girls told of their flight;
And the jokes they cracked and tricks they played
And the jolliest kind of fun they made.
And how they saw them locked and tied
So tight and fast that children cried.
Some little girls and wee boys too
Wouldn’t go to bed until they knew
How TEDDY-B and TEDDY-G
Got out of the trunk without a key;
But their papas told them not to mind,
That some one the Bears that night would find
And the papers sure the following day
Would explain in full how they got away.
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