The xxxvi. Chapter. 459.
The storie of Saint Margaret prooved to be both ridiculous and impious in everie point.
F IRST, that the storie of S. Margaret is a fable, may be prooved by the incredible, impossible, foolish, impious, and blasphemous matters conteined therein, and by the ridiculous circumstance thereof. Though it were cruellie doone of hir to beat the divell, when his hands were bound; yet it was courteouslie doone of hir, to pull awaie hir foot at his desire. He could not speake so long as she troad on his head, and yet he said; Tread off, that I may tell you what I am. She sawe the heavens open, and yet she was in a close prison. But hir sight was verie cleare, that could see a little dove sitting upon a crosse so farre off. For heaven is higher than the sunne; and the sunne, when it is neerest to us, is 3966000. miles from us.Secundùm Bordinum Corrigens. Quæsit. Math. tract. 1. sect. 77. And she had a good paire of eares, that could heare a dove speake so farre off. And she had good lucke, that S. Peter, who (they saie) is porter, or else the pope, who hath more dooings than Peter, had such leisure as to staie the gates so long/332. for hir. Salomon provided no good place, neither tooke good order with his brasen bowle. I marvell how they escaped that let out the divels. It is marvell also they melted it not with their breath long before: for the divels carrie hell and hell fier about with them alwaies; in so much as (they saie) they leave ashes evermore where they stand.Psellus de operatione dæmonum. Surelie she made in hir praier an unreasonable request. But the date of hir patent is out: for I beleeve that whosoever at this daie shall burne a pound of good candle before hir, shall be never the better, but three pence the worsse. But now we may find in S. Margarets life, who it is that is Christes wife: whereby we are so much wiser than we were before. But looke in the life of S. Katharine, in the golden legend, and you shall find that he was also married to S. Katharine, and that our ladie made the marriage, &c. An excellent authoritie for/460. bigamie. Here I will also cite other of their notable stories, or miracles of authoritie, and so leave shaming of them, or rather troubling you the readers thereof. Neither would I have written these fables, but that they are authentike among the papists, and that we that are protestants may be satisfied, as well of conjurors and witches miracles, as of the others: for the one is as grosse as the other.