Introduction
Children, although you might expect
My manners to be quite correct
(For since I fancy I can teach,
I ought to practice what I preach),
’Tis true that I have often braved
My mother’s wrath, and misbehaved!
And almost every single rule
I broke, before I went to school!
For that is how I learned the way
To teach you etiquette to-day.
So when you chance to take a look
At all the maxims in the book,
You’ll see that most of them are true,
I found them out, and so will you,
For if you are as GOOP derided,
You may perhaps reform, as I did!