An Old Song of an Old Courtier and a New
With an Old Song made by an Old Ancient pate,
Of an Old worshipful Gentleman who had a great Estate;
Who kept an old house at a bountiful rate,
And an old Porter to relieve the Poore at his Gate,
Like an old Courtier of the Queens.
With an old Lady whose anger and [? one] good word asswages,
Who every quarter payes her old Servants their wages,
Who never knew what belongs to Coachmen, Footmen, & Pages,
But kept twenty thrifty old Fellows, with blew-coats and badges,
Like an old Courtier of the Queens.
With an old Study fill’d full of Learned books,
With an old Reverent Parson, you may judge him by his looks,
With an old Buttery hatch worn quite off the old hooks,
And an old Kitching, which maintains half a dozen old cooks;
Like an old Courtier of the Queens.
With an old Hall hung round about with Guns, Pikes, and Bowes,
With old swords & bucklers, which hath born[e] many shrew’d blows,
And an old Frysadoe coat to cover his Worships trunk hose,
And a cup of old Sherry to comfort his Copper Nose;
Like an old Courtier of the Queens.
With an old Fashion, when Christmas is come,
To call in his Neighbours with Bag-pipe and Drum,
And good chear enough to furnish every old Room,
And old liquor able to make a cat speak, and a wise man dumb;
like an Old [Courtier of the Queens.]
With an old Hunts-man, a Falkoner, and a Kennel of Hounds;
Which never Hunted, nor Hawked but in his own Grounds;
Who like an old wise man kept himself within his own bounds,
And when he died gave every child a thousand old pounds;
like an Old [Courtier of the Queens.]
But to his eldest Son his house and land he assign’d,
Charging him in his Will to keep the same bountiful mind,
To be good to his Servants, and to his Neighbours kind,
But in th’ ensuing Ditty you shall hear how he was enclin’d;
like a young Courtier of the Kings.
[Part Second.]
Like a young Gallant newly come to his Land,
That keeps a brace of Creatures at’s own command,
And takes up a thousand pounds upon’s own Band,
And lieth drunk in a new Tavern, till he can neither go nor stand;
like a young [Courtier of the Kings].
With a neat Lady that is fresh and fair,
Who never knew what belong’d to good housekeeping or care,
But buyes several Fans to play with the wanton ayre,
And seventeen or eighteen dressings of other womens haire;
like a young [Courtier of the Kings].
With a new Hall built where the old one stood,
Wherein is burned neither coale nor wood,
And a new Shuffel-board-table where never meat stood,
Hung Round with Pictures, which doth the poor little good.
like a young [Courtier of the Kings].
With a new study stuff’t full of Pamphlets and playes,
With a new Chaplin, that swears faster then he prayes,
With a new Buttery hatch that opens once in four or five dayes,
With a new French-Cook to make Kickshawes and Tayes;
like a young Courtier of the Kings.
With a new Fashion, when Christmasse is come,
With a journey up to London we must be gone,
And leave no body at home but our new Porter John,
Who relieves the poor with a thump on the back with a stone;
Like a young [Courtier of the Kings].
With a Gentleman-Vsher whose carriage is compleat,
With a Footman, a Coachman, a Page to carry meat,
With a waiting Gentlewoman, whose dressing is very neat,
Who when the master hath dyn’d gives the servants litle meat;
Like a young [Courtier of the Kings].
With a new honour bought with his Fathers Old Gold,
That many of his Fathers Old Manors hath sold,
And this is the occasion that most men do hold,
That good Hous[e]-keeping is now-a-dayes grown so cold;
Like a young Courtier of the Kings.
[Here follow, Arthur of Bradley (see Merry Drollery, Compleat, p. 312); The Green Gown: “Pan leave piping,” (see Westm. Droll., Appendix, p. 54); Gelding of the Devil: “Now listen a while, and I will you tell” (see Merry D., C., p. 200); Sir Egle More (ibid, p. 257); and St. George for England (ibid, p. 309). But, as the variations are great, in the last of these, it is here given from the Antidote ag. Mel., p. 26.]
[p. 26.]