Epitaph on a Noisy Polemic
Below thir stanes lie Jamie’s banes; O Death, it’s my opinion, Thou ne’er took such a bleth’rin bitch Into thy dark dominion!
Epitaph on a Henpecked Country Squire
As father Adam first was fool’d, (A case that’s still too common,) Here lies man a woman ruled, The devil ruled the woman.
Epigram on the Said Occasion
O Death, had’st thou but spar’d his life, Whom we this day lament, We freely wad exchanged the wife, And a’ been weel content. Ev’n as he is, cauld in his graff, The swap we yet will do’t; Tak thou the carlin’s carcase aff, Thou’se get the saul o’boot.