Malingerers
It is remarkable that the blockade runners seldom included in their complement of officers and crew a professional doctor or surgeon, although there were occasions when they were greatly needed. Few of our men were wounded, although the bombshells burst all round us again and again and finally sunk the Lilian to a level with the deck.
The runs from Wilmington to Nassau were made in forty-eight to fifty-two hours, and to Bermuda in seventy-two to eighty hours, and the sick or wounded received scant attention until they reached port. It therefore devolved upon the purser or the chief officer to attend such cases, and my very limited knowledge of medicine restricted the treatment of our alleged sick men to compound cathartic pills and quinine. A majority of the cases of “pains all over them” were malingerers, some of whom dodged their duty during the entire voyage. Captain Hobart, of the Don, told us of such a case on his ship interviewed by his chief officer, C——, as follows:
C.: “Well, my man, what’s the matter with you?”
Patient: “Please, sir, I’ve got pains all over me.”
C.: “Oh, all over you, are they? That’s bad.”
Then during the pause it was evident that something was being mixed up, and I could hear C—— say: “Here, take this, and come again in the evening.” (Exit patient.)
Then C—— said to himself: “I don’t think he’ll come again; he has got two drops of the croton. Skulking rascal, pains all over him, eh?”
“I never heard the voice of that patient again,” said Captain Hobart; “in fact, after a short time we had no cases of sickness on board.”
C—— explained that what he served out, as he called it, was croton oil; and that none of the crew came twice for treatment.
The ship’s discipline was generally well maintained at sea, but instances of insubordination in port were of almost daily occurrence. These were dealt with usually by the first mate, or, as he was designated, the chief officer. But some of the incorrigibles were brought before the commander for treatment and something like this colloquy, which I take partly from Punch, would ensue:
Commander: “What is this man’s character apart from this offence?”
Petty Officer: “Well, sir, this here man, he goes ashore when he likes, he comes aboard when he likes, he uses ’orrible language when he’s spoke to. In fact from his general behavior he might be taken for the captain of this ship,” which exactly fitted the case of our skipper at that time, who was an expert in the use of ‘orrible language.