Chapter VI Revolt
Lady Brent sat in her business room, engaged in affairs, or apparently so. Business room it was called, but it was little like one except for the large writing-table in the window at which she sat, and as a matter of fact she transacted most of the actual business of house and estate which fell to her share in a room downstairs called the Steward’s room, which was far more severely furnished. This large upstairs room, with its deep embrasured window looking on to the park, was her fastness, and she did not often withdraw herself into its seclusion. It was next to her bedroom, and might have been better called her boudoir, but that the ancient and severe splendour of its furnishing would have seemed to rebuke such a name. It was richly carved and panelled, the furniture was heavy and sombre, and lightened by none of the modern touches which made the long drawing-room downstairs, which was mostly used, bright and even gay. This room was as characteristic of the old romantic Castle as any in it. It spoke of a time long gone by, and of a life more austere than modern life is apt to be. There were few comforts in it but a great deal of rich massive dignity. When Lady Brent ensconced herself in it she was the chatelaine of the Castle, seated in state, and as formidable as it was in her power to make herself.
Mrs. Brent, coming in from the Vicarage, wrought up to her purpose, looked for her in the long drawing-room, and not finding her there had the intuition that she was in her business room. She hesitated a little before going upstairs to verify it, making a further draught upon her determination. Of course! She had known that it was coming to a row. She was as sharp as a cartload of monkeys, and had seen that the row was likely to occur just at this very time. That was why she had taken to her business room, when by all usual habits she would have been sitting downstairs or in the garden, during the hour before luncheon.
So thought Mrs. Brent, mounting the oak staircase, and summoning all her resolution. She wouldn’t be awed by the stately lady in the stately room. After all, it was only a piece of play-acting. She knew something about play-acting herself. She would be cold and stately too, announce her determination and then go away. She’d show that she wasn’t to be put upon. Perhaps it would be easier like that. There would be no leading up to the subject and no discussion after it, as there must have been if she had joined her mother-in-law downstairs, and felt compelled to sit on with her.
But she knew, as she opened the door, that it would not be easier.
“Oh, I wondered where you were. I just wanted to say something to you, if you’re not too busy.”
The tone did not seem right, somehow, even to herself. Lady Brent turned round from the table at which she was sitting, and took off the tortoise-shell rimmed glasses which she wore for reading and writing. She did not look in the least degree formidable—a well-preserved, well-dressed, middle-aged lady, not really obliged to wear glasses, even for reading and writing, and not wanting them at all for anything else. “Yes, certainly, Charlotte,” she said, “I have nearly finished what I came here to do, and you are not interrupting me at all.”
Mrs. Brent had an impulse to make up some trivial message and go away, but conquered it. Her voice shook a little as she said, still standing: “I wish to go up to London, for a few days—say a week—as soon as possible.”
Again she had not satisfied herself. She had used the prim reserved tone of a maid giving notice—“I wish to leave at the end of my month.” It seemed to her that she had only just prevented herself adding, “my lady.”
Lady Brent received it much as she might have received notice from a servant, whose temporary dissatisfaction with her place must not be taken too seriously. “Why do you want to do that?” she asked, in a level, even a kindly voice.
It touched some chord in Mrs. Brent. She had, perhaps, prepared herself for a peremptory refusal, and if it had come she would have been ready to combat it, and obstinate to push her determination through. But supposing her request should, after all, be granted! That would put everything right and save a lot of trouble.
All the irritation she had been piling up against Lady Brent would be dissolved. She did not want to quarrel with her, if it could be avoided. She would have to go on living with her, whether she had a short respite now or not. And it had not always been so very disagreeable to live with her.
“Oh, I must, I really must,” she said. “I can’t stand it any longer. Just a week! I’ll go and see my mother, and be as quiet as possible. Harry needn’t know I’m going to her, if you don’t want him to, though I don’t see what difference it would make.”
“I think I do,” said Lady Brent quietly. “But perhaps you’d better sit down, and talk it over. What is it you can’t stand any longer? If there’s anything wrong here we ought to be able to put it right. Only I must first know what it is.”
Mrs. Brent sat down. She saw that her appeal had been a mistake. She could not now coldly state her intention and support it against opposition, behaving as one stately lady towards another, as she had pictured it to herself, coming up the staircase. And of course Lady Brent did not mean to let her go, if she could help it.
She sat down in a high-backed Carolean chair. “I don’t want to go into all that,” she said stiffly. “I shall be able to stand it all right when I come back. A little holiday is what I really want, and what I mean to have. It’s not much to ask, after nearly eighteen years. Well, I say ask—but I’m not asking. I’m just telling you that I’m going away on Thursday, or perhaps Friday, and I shall come back in a week—or ten days.”
It was not quite the address of one stately lady to another, but it seemed to have served its turn. Lady Brent turned back to her writing-table and took up her rimmed spectacles.
“Very well,” she said.
Mrs. Brent sat in her high-backed chair, looking at her. She placed her spectacles upon her well-shaped nose, and took up her pen. Then she said, as calmly as before: “If you tell me you are going there is no more to be said. I’ll finish what I’m doing now, before luncheon.”
“Then you’re ready for me to go; you don’t mind,” said Mrs. Brent.
“It doesn’t much matter whether I mind or not, does it? You tell me you are going. You refuse to discuss it with me?”
“Well, I don’t want to make trouble. It’s no good talking over things. There’s nothing much wrong, really. If I go away now for a bit I shall be all right when I come back. I expect, really, I shall be rather glad to get back.”
Lady Brent put down her pen and took off her spectacles. “Oh, but if you go away you won’t come back,” she said, turning towards her again. “Surely you understand that!”
Mrs. Brent felt that she had been entrapped into an opening unfavourable to herself. Now was the time, if she had it in her, to exercise the restraint and reserve shown by Lady Brent. But it was not in her; she became angry at once, and showed her anger.
“Of course I might have known that you were leading me on,” she said bitterly. “I dare say it seems very clever to you, and it’s what you’re always doing. But I’m not going to give in to it any more. I’m going away—only just for a little holiday—and I’m coming back. You can’t prevent me. This is my home. I’ve lived here getting on for eighteen years—me and my child. I dare say you’d like to keep him and get rid of me. But you can’t do it.”
“If I wanted to do that I could do it,” returned Lady Brent; and, as the statement brought no immediate response, she repeated it, in the same level tone but with slightly increased emphasis. “If I wanted to do that I could do it.”
“Perhaps you could do it, by law,” said Mrs. Brent. “I don’t know anything about the law, except what you’ve told me. Perhaps you could and perhaps you couldn’t. But there’s one thing you can’t do, and that’s take away my child’s love for me, though I dare say you’d like to do that too. You don’t suppose that if I went away and came back here and you had me turned away from the door, you wouldn’t hear something about it from him. You don’t suppose that, do you? He’s pretty near a man now. You’re his guardian till he comes of age; I know that you had yourself made so by the law, and I didn’t make any objection; you told me it was best for him, and I believed you. But you’d find it wasn’t all a question of law if you tried any game of that sort. I don’t know what Harry would do, but I do know that whatever he did it wouldn’t suit your book.”
Lady Brent had listened to this speech without showing the smallest sign of discomposure, but her light blue eyes were hard and cold as she said: “There is a good deal of truth in what you say. Your going away would completely upset everything that has been done during the last eighteen years for Harry’s benefit. Both you and I have made sacrifices on his behalf. We agreed to do so when you came here before he was born. I have kept strictly to the bargain. I should not, for my own pleasure, live the retired life that I do here, all the year round, with you as my constant companion. For my own sake I should be immensely relieved to say good-bye to you for a time, if it were possible.”
“Yes, that’s the sort of nasty thing you say.”
“Isn’t it exactly what you say to me? Why should you suppose your society is any more gratification to me than mine is to you?”
“I wish to goodness you would say good-bye to me, then, for a time. Why isn’t it possible? It is possible. I tell you I’m going, and I’m coming back.”
“Do you remember anything at all about the bargain we struck when you first came here, or have you forgotten it entirely, after nearly eighteen years, as you say?”
“Of course I remember it. You didn’t mince your words then any more than you do now. You made me feel that I was dirt beneath your feet, but you’d put up with me for the sake of preventing my boy—if it was to be a boy—doing what his father had done, and marrying somebody he loved, if you didn’t think she was good enough for him.”
“You can put it like that if it pleases you. You consented to everything. You yourself wanted the child brought up with nothing to remind him that on one side his birth wasn’t suited to his long ancestry on the other. I warned you what the sacrifice would be. It meant giving up your own people, for one thing, and you gladly consented to do that. It meant your doing your utmost to fill the position that I freely offered you here.”
“So I have done my utmost.”
“And now, when what we agreed to do together has turned out better than either of us could have hoped for, when we are very nearly at the end of it, and can send Harry out into the world what we have made of him here, you want to break the bargain. And why? Not for any good it can possibly do him, but just because you want to go back to what you were before you came here—for your own petty selfish pleasure.”
“It isn’t that,” she said vehemently. “I say it isn’t natural that anybody should cut themselves off from their own flesh and blood. I loved my father and he died without me setting eyes on him. You let me write to mother then. I didn’t do it without asking you, and——”
“Didn’t we strike the bargain afresh then? Didn’t I say I was sorry that it should have been required of you to cut yourself off from your family, but that it had already then proved to be the right course? And didn’t you agree with me, though it was harder for you to bear then than at any time?”
The tears came. “Of course it was hard, then,” she said. “But you were kind to me. So you were when I first came. If I was giving up something, I was going to get something too. All that I’d been was to be forgotten, though it isn’t true that I’d been anything that I ought not to have been. Harry was to grow up knowing me as belonging here. You were to be his legal guardian, but he was to be my child.”
“Yes, and I might have struck a much harder bargain with you than that. You would have consented. I might have taken the child and paid you off. That’s often done, you know, in cases like yours.”
She was sobbing now. “You’re cruel,” she said. “Yes, you are cruel, even when you’re pretending to be nice. You like hurting me. Pay me off! Anybody’d think, to hear you talk, I’d been a loose woman.”
“I’ve never said that, or implied it.”
“No, you’ve never said it. You wouldn’t dare. But you’ve made me feel that’s how you look at me. Why didn’t you pay me off, then, and get rid of me?”
“Exactly. Why didn’t I?”
“Well? I’m asking you.”
“I was willing to give you your chance. Whatever I may have thought of you, I didn’t want to deprive you of your child, or him of his mother, so long as you were ready to make yourself the kind of mother he ought to have had. You said you’d do it. You were grateful to me. You consented to every stipulation I laid down. The chief of them all was that you should break absolutely with your past until he came of age. Then you could do what you liked; it would be between you and him. Now you want to break that stipulation. I say that if you break it on one side you break it on the other; I also say that it would be a very wicked thing to break it, now at this time.”
“It wouldn’t be if you’d just let me go away for a bit and come back.”
“That I won’t do. Why do you want to go away? It isn’t just to see your mother. I know that well enough. You want the life of London, the life you led there before Harry was born—theatres, and suppers and gaiety, with the sort of people that you ought to be ashamed of mixing yourself up with, when you think about Harry, and what he is. You’ve done without it for nearly eighteen years. For goodness’ sake do without it for a little time longer. Don’t knock down what we’ve been building up for all these years, just for a selfish whim. Think of Harry, not of yourself.”
“I do think of him. I love him better than anything in the world. I’d go barefoot if it was to do something for him.”
“You’re not asked to go barefoot. All you’re asked to do is to go on living the quiet but very comfortable life that you’ve lived here for years past, and make the best of it. It’s what I’m doing myself.”
She dried her eyes and rose from her chair. “I see I’m not going to get any kindness from you,” she said. “But I’ll think about it. Perhaps I shan’t go. I’ve stood it so long that perhaps I can stand it a bit longer. If I was sure it was for Harry’s good I’d never move out of the place till I was carried out. I’ll think about it and let you know.”
“You needn’t let me know anything,” said Lady Brent. “If you go you go, and if you stay you stay.”
With that Mrs. Brent left her. She did not immediately return to whatever she had been doing, but sat looking out through the open casement across the open spaces of the park to the woods beyond. Her face was still hard and still watchful. By and by she looked at her watch, and almost immediately a knock came at the door. She answered as if she had been expecting it, and Wilbraham came into the room.
There was a sullen discontented expression on his face, which was unusual with him. He had kind lazy eyes and a whimsical twist on his mobile lips; but all that was obliterated.
He took his seat without invitation in the chair recently vacated by Mrs. Brent. “I want to go away for two or three weeks’ holiday,” he said, scowling slightly, and handling his bunched fingers. “Now you’re going to have that man over from Burport for Harry’s mathematics he can do without me—say for a month. He’s well up in my subjects. The more he works at his mathematics the better it will be for him.”
“Why do you want to go away just now?” she asked, as she had asked of Mrs. Brent.
“Why does anybody ever want to go away?” he said. “I want a holiday, and if I’m to go on here I must have one.”
“If you want a holiday from work, there ought to be no difficulty about that. You know what’s best for Harry. If you think that Mr. Fletcher will be of more use to him now, by all means arrange it like that and leave yourself altogether free for a time.”
“Thanks very much. Of course I shouldn’t want to do anything that would keep Harry back. You know that.”
“Oh yes, I know that. He was to come first in everything. That was agreed upon between us when you first came here. I saw very soon that I could leave questions of education entirely to you, and I have always done so.”
“Well, now I want to go away for a month or so. I’m getting stale. I’m not doing him justice.”
“Perhaps not. I’ve been feeling that for some little time. But I don’t think it would help you to do him justice if you went away so that you could drink, and undo everything that——”
“Lady Brent!” He was startled and outraged, and glared at her terrifically.
She was not moved. “That’s what’s the matter with you,” she said, in the same even voice, “though you may not acknowledge it to yourself. I’m very sorry that this has happened. I had thought that after all these years the craving had left you. I don’t think it can be as strong as it was. I ran the risk when I asked you to come here, and helped you over the difficult time. It is years since you told me last that the desire was strong in you, but it was easier to overcome it. What a pity to give way now!”
His deep frown had not altered while she was speaking. “Give way!” he echoed. “I’ve no intention of giving way. You’ve no right to speak of that at all. It was all over long ago.”
“I helped you to get over it, didn’t I?”
“Yes, you did. I’m not denying it. You can be a good friend to a man when it suits you; to a woman too, I dare say. But you’re difficult to live with. I want to get away for a time. There’s nothing to fear, of that old weakness. Perhaps I ought not to resent your bringing it up against me, but——”
“You wouldn’t resent it if what I say wasn’t true. You may not know it yourself, but you’re playing with the idea of giving way. If you did give way you’d be very sorry for it afterwards, no doubt, but the mischief would have been done. You’d no longer be a fit companion for Harry. It’s him I’m thinking about. You can do what you like, but if you go away you don’t come back. It’s what I’ve just said to Charlotte, who wants the same as you do. I’m not going to have everything spoilt when our task is coming near its end. If she’s a foolish woman, you’re an intelligent man. You can see it all as well as I can if you clear your mind of its vapours. You know it wouldn’t do. You must stay here until you have finished with Harry. Then you can do what you like—stay here or go away.”
“It won’t matter what becomes of me then, I suppose.”
“I said that you could stay here if you liked. This has been your home for ten years. It can go on being your home as long as you value it; or at least as long as I have anything to do with it.”
He sat looking down, still frowning; but his frown had more of thought, and less of anger in it now.
He threw a glance at her sitting there self-possessed and at ease, and a wry smile came to his lips. “Why can’t you always behave like that?” he asked. “I suppose the fact is you’ve worked off all your temper on that poor little creature who’s been telling you just the same as I have. I met her crying on the stairs just now, and she wouldn’t tell me what it was about. But I could guess.”
She showed some surprise, but no resentment. “My temper!” she exclaimed. “Well, I suppose I must pass that over in the state to which you’ve reduced yourself.”
His face became moody again. “I won’t ask you what you mean by that,” he said. “But you’re quite wrong in what you said just now. Would you consent to my going away with Grant, if I could get him to come with me? He’s rather a fool, but I’d rather have his company than—than——”
“Than mine, I suppose. No, I wouldn’t consent to that. You came here on certain conditions, and you must keep to them. It won’t be for very much longer now. I’m not altogether without sympathy with you. I’ve felt the strain myself.”
He broke into a loud laugh, and went on laughing, while she waited patiently for him to finish, as if no vagary on his part could surprise or upset her.
“Oh, that’s too rich,” he said, “in that tone! Yes, you’ve been feeling the strain, and you’ve made us feel it. That’s all the trouble. Well now, look here, Lady Brent, I accept what you say about its being too late to alter things now—or too early—whichever you please. We’re all three of us in the bargain, I take it. It was your idea to keep the boy shut up here, and it has paid. I don’t believe it would have paid nine times out of ten, and we’ve yet to see how it will turn out when the test comes. But Harry being what he is, it has been a brilliant success—so far. You’ve been justified in keeping me and his mother shut up here too.”
“And myself, you must remember. I’ve shut myself up too, so as to make it seem all the most natural thing in the world to him.”
“Quite so. And you’ve suffered for it, just as we have. Suffered in your temper. If we stick to it, as we must, you ought to make it as easy for us as possible. You haven’t lately.”
“So Charlotte seemed to imply. But I should like to know how.”
“Oh, you know how, well enough. You said I was a man of intelligence just now. Well, you’re a woman of intelligence. Just think it over.”
He nodded his head, knowingly. He looked rather ridiculous, and Lady Brent laughed.
“I wish you’d go away,” she said. “I want to finish what I’m doing before luncheon. You may tell Charlotte, if you like, that I’m sorry if I spoke harshly to her just now. She annoyed me and I did not pick my words. When three people live together year in and year out they are apt to get annoyed with one another occasionally, for no particular reason.”