Gilhooley’s Estate
(A ballad concerning the amalgamation of the legal professions.)
Oh, Mr. Gilhooley he turned up his toes,
As most of us do, soon or late;
And Jones was a lawyer, as everyone knows,
So they took him Gilhooley’s Estate.
Gilhooley in life had been living so free
’Twas thought his possessions were great,
So Jones, with a smile, says, “There’s many a fee
For me in Gilhooley’s Estate.”
They made out a list of his property fine,
It totalled a thousand-and-eight;
But the debts were nine hundred and ninety and nine—
The debts of Gilhooley’s Estate.
So Mrs. Gilhooley says, “Jones, my dear man,
My childer have little to ait:
Just keep the expenses as low as you can
Against poor Gilhooley’s Estate.”
But Jones says, “The will isn’t clear in its terms,
I fear it will need some debate,
And the law won’t allow me (attorneys are worms)
To appear in Gilhooley’s Estate.”
So a barrister-man, with a wig on his head,
And a brief in his hand quite elate,
Went up to the Court where they bury the dead,
Just to move in Gilhooley’s Estate.
But his Honor the Judge said, “I think that the joint
Legatees must be called to probate—
Ex parte Pokehorney is clear on the point—
The point of Gilhooley’s Estate.
“I order a suit to be brought just to try
If this is correct that I state—
A nice friendly suit, and the costs, by and by,
Must be borne by Gilhooley’s Estate.”
So Mrs. Gilhooley says, “Jones, you’ll appear!
Thim barristers’ fees is too great;
The suit is but friendly.” “Attorneys, my dear,
Can’t be heard in Gilhooley’s Estate.”
From the Barristers’ Court there’s a mighty hurrah
Arises both early and late:
It’s only the whoop of the Junior Bar
Dividing Gilhooley’s Estate.