Chapter XXIV Chilvern’s Ballad — The Moral
Chilvern has got a Ballad which Medford sets to music. It is illustrated by tableaux vivants, performed by Miss Adelaide Cherton, Cazell, and Milburd.
“Farewell,” cries Corporal Tim.
“Farewell,” said Molly, to him;
“You’re going,” says she,
“I’m going,” says he,
“To fight in Tartary Crim.”
(Sadly.) “To fight in Tartary Crim!”
“I see,” sobs Corporal Tim,
“You’re eyes with weeping are dim.”
“No, no,” says she,
“Don’t stop for me,
But go to Tartary Crim.”
(More sadly.) “Oh! go to Tartary Crim!”
“One word,” says Corporal Tim;
“I have a young friend called Jim,
He’ll act to you,
Like a brother would do,
While I’m in Tartary Crim.”
(Most sadly.) “While you’re in Tartary Crim.”
“The ship is off!” cried Tim.
He raised his hat by the brim;
He waved it about,
While she sobbed out,
“He’s off to Tartary Crim.”
(Frantically.) “He’s off to Tartary Crim.”
Now this young man called Jim,
Was strong and not too slim;
He was a tar,
On a man-of-war,
Arrived from Tartary Crim.
(Cheerfully.) Arrived from Tartary Crim.
Now this young man called Jim,
He took a holiday whim;
Says he, to Molly,
“Oh, let’s be jolly,
While he’s in Tartary Crim.”
(Jovially.) “While he’s in Tartary Crim.”
One day, said Jovial Jim,
“I’ve got some news of Tim;
His ship, three-decked,
Was smashed and wrecked,
On leaving Tartary Crim.”
(Dubiously.) “On leaving Tartary Crim.”
“He’s drowned! poor Corporal Tim!”
Then Molly sang a hymn.
“Now, Jim,” says she,
“You’ll marry me,
And bother Tartary Crim.”
(Decidedly.) “And bother Tartary Crim.”
One night at home with Jim,
Appeared a figure grim.
Cries she, “’Tis T——!”
“It is,” says he;
“I’ve come from Tartary Crim.”
(Spectrally.) “I’ve come from Tartary Crim.”
“You didn’t think,” says Tim,
“That corporals could swim
But ghosts know how
To swim—I’m now—
(Spectrally.) My ghost!—from Tartary Crim.”
And then they saw that Tim
Had fins on every limb;
His feet went squish—
Cries Jim, “I wish
I was in Tartary Crim.”
(Excitedly.) “Away to Tartary Crim!”
He took a jump, did Jim,
Right on to a vessel’s rim;
She made a tack,
And he never came back,
To her or Tartary Crim.
(With certainty.) To her or Tartary Crim.
The ghost of Corporal Tim
Took Molly away with him,
And plunged in the sea,
And there they be,
Two ghosts in Tartary Crim.
Moral (sung by the ghost of Molly).
“Oh, when you hear that Tim
Is drowned, don’t marry Jim,
Or else, like me,
You’ll have to be
A ghost in Tartary Crim.”