Rochester, Minn
(With apologies to the Mayos)
Mr. Smith had gallstones,
Mr. Jones had gout,
Bad appendices had the Browns
But now they’ve been cut out.
Rachel had a goitre,
Susan a queer spleen,
A tumor worried Mrs. Wright
Though it could not be seen.
Robert had large tonsils
And Dick had adenoids, too,
Bill Green had never had an ear,
He did when they got through.
Peggy had a leaky heart,
Her father had no hair,
Both heart and head are now fixed up
And what a happy pair!
And I—well I have nothing wrong—
That’s why I don’t feel right;
I’ll pay my bill at this hotel
And go back home to-night.